Everything was okay today, but I am not feeling okay. I think that when you lose something or someone you care about, you die a little bit inside. I think that it takes a long time to feel okay again.
Life is all about choices. Your first choice is to recognize an that you have options. Your second choice is to be grateful for it.
“You become a house where the wind blows straight through, because no one bothers the crack in the window or lock on the door, and you’re the house where people come and go as they please, because you’re simply too unimpressed to care. You let people in who you really shouldn’t let in, and you let them walk around for a while, use your bed and use your books, and await the day when they simply get bored and leave. You’re still not bothered, though you knew they shouldn’t have been let in in the first place, but still you just sit there, apathetic like a beggar in the desert.”
Charlotte Eriksson, You’re Doing Just Fine
Every once in a while you will text me out of the blue. I’m assuming it’s when you need an ego stroke or you’re feeling particularly insecure about something.
You say you want to be friends but we have to keep it a secret because your wife would be upset. I don’t respond. I never do. It doesn’t stop you from texting. I doubt you’ll ever give up. It’s not your style. But it’s more about you than me.
I saw one of our mutual friends and they told me the good news that your wife is pregnant and you’re having a baby. Good for you.
I bet she doesn’t know you won’t stop texting me. Just like she doesn’t know that I never respond. Even though I want to. I don’t. I miss you. I hate that you’re married and having a baby. But what I hate the most is that I was right about you.